Con was amazing. I met a lot of fantastic people and had the time of my life. These people I’m far closer with than any of my “IRL” friends which makes leaving that much harder. I had booked a flight out at 6am Sunday and we had a late night Saturday so I was on one hour of sleep. I only left so early because I had promised a friend I’d go to a concert with her. But as I sat on the first flight (there was a layover in between) I realized I was far too exhausted to go. Made me sad I had just stayed and enjoyed the last day before flying out.
Now I’m coming off that con high and the depression and anxiety of going back to the routine is sinking in. I miss my friends. I miss the freedom to be me without judgement. I miss thoroughly enjoying myself. Don’t get me wrong, I love my husband and critters and missed them too. But work? My shallow friendships back at home? I don’t miss that.
Additionally, everyone’s aware of the Orlando shooting. Okay, well, I’m not an “out” bisexual except to three people, two of which just happened last week and they did not respond well and the other is my husband. I got to be out to my friends at con. Then the shooting happened that morning I left. And it just…hit home I guess.
I’m just exhausted in so many ways.